Thursday, December 31, 2020

Goodbye 2020

2020 will go down history as one of the very few years that billions of people wish to forget. At the end of 2020, history deserves a tally of the human price we've paid, and continue to pay... May each lost soul Rest in Peace.


U.S. 2020 Covid-19 death toll:

2/06/2020 = 1

2/17/2020 = 2

3/06/2020 = 3

3/31/2020 = 4,028

4/30/2020 = 61,481

5/31/2020 = 103,781

6/30/2020 = 126,141

7/31/2020 = 152,075

8/31/2020 = 183,068

9/30/2020 = 205,998

10/31/2020 = 228,675

11/30/2020 = 266,887

12/31/2020 = 342,414


1918 Spanish Flu: U.S. deaths = 675,000 = 1.35% of the world's total deaths

Covid-19 (as of 12/31/2020): U.S. deaths = 342,414 = 18.9% of the world's total deaths

Tuesday, December 29, 2020

100 Years Ago and Today...

It's about time for me to utilize my analytical skills to help you see Covid-19 stats horizontally and vertically.  Attached below are the Covid-19 numbers from yesterday, 12/28/2020. 

Infected cases: US = 23.7% of the world

Deaths: US = 18.9% of the world

During the 1918-1920 Spanish Flu, US deaths = 1.35% of the world (675000 / 50mil = 1.35%).

US population in 1920 = 106.5mil.  US Spanish Flu death rate = 675000 / 106.5m = 0.63%.

US Covid-19 death rate (model projection through 3/31/2021) = 560000 / 331mil = 0.17%.  However, 3/2021 will not be the end of the Covid-19 death.

When reaching 675K deaths in later 2021, the US Covid-19 death rate = 675000 / 331mil = 0.20% (not much better than 100 years ago, when we didn't have vaccine or ventilators or Ecmo machines, etc.).

It's hard to comprehend the fact that 100 years later, with the most advanced medicine in the world, US in 2020-2021 will have at least 675K deaths from the pandemic, the same amount as the pandemic from 100 years ago.  Just take a minute to think about it -- if this is not stunning, what is????? 

I hate to express all these deaths as numbers.  Dr. Michelle called me late Sunday night crying -- because of the overwhelming amount of the dying patients in her ICU unit... So many people's lives have been deeply impacted and altered, forever.  Take a minute to let it sink in.  Cherish life and share love with those who are in need.
 

 



Sunday, December 20, 2020

Happy Holidays!!

Happy Holidays!!

Feels like I have been sending these holiday greetings for the past many, many years... However, this year is different, in many ways.

As difficult as it has been for all of us over the past 9 months, I am grateful for everything I have. The past 280 days have taught me how to truly understand the pain and suffering of many other people; and how to truly appreciate life - each and every day.  Although the concept of "living life fully" has become a bit harder to grasp these days, I sincerely hope that 2021 will offer new opportunities for all of us to challenge our limits, test our true capacity to live a happy and productive life during uncertain times.

Wishing you and your family a safe, healthy and happy holiday season!!



Saturday, October 24, 2020

The Unthinkable...

Did you ever have dreams about going to school without your backpack? This nightmare had followed me for years until long after college... I remember every time waking up from the nightmare, I felt that the event was so unthinkable that it would never happen to me in real life.

Well, the unthinkable did happen to me this morning, in real life!!

I was dragged out of bed by the alarm clock at 6am.  I planned to go take some special photos of the red maple leaves.  The place was about 35 miles away from my home. I rushed through everything and got into the car... When I arrived at the location, I realized that I forgot my camera bags -- two of them, carefully packed and put by the doorway last night.

Wow, can you imagine that?  For a few seconds, I really didn't know what to do -- Do I go home to get the camera bags?  Do I even have time to come back to catch the first light??  Should I just forget about the whole thing???  

What should I do???  Wait, didn't I just learn to accept imperfection?  With that, I pulled out my iPhone and snapped 1 shot -- just to record the first sunlight shining through the fall leaves. 

Not perfect, but it captures the sentiment... 

Hoffman Estates, IL
October 24, 2020




Monday, October 12, 2020

Sound of Autumn (2)

Knowing how precious, fragile, and unpredictable lives are, what I've learned over the past 6 months is to accept imperfection -- it's okay to take a trip without producing perfect photos; it's okay to take a photo without perfect lights; it's okay to frame an image without the leaves perfectly lined up...

Life is actually perfect when you allow yourself to step outside of your own world and be able to enjoy it thoroughly -- in whatever shape or form.

Door County, WI
October 10, 2020
14 hours covering 612 miles



 

Sunday, October 11, 2020

Sound of Autumn

Have you ever let yourself step outside of your world, blend into the colorful falling leaves, close your eyes, and just listen to the sound of autumn?  I did, yesterday, and it was an amazing experience...

Door County, WI
October 10, 2020
 



Saturday, September 19, 2020

32 years ago...

Today was the 32-year anniversary of me being in this country.  I found the 2 diary entries I made right before I left Beijing and right after I arrived in Chicago -- pretty incredible how we dared to drop everything and just came to a strange place...


1988.9.13(二)

 
到了最后的时刻,也许这是我在中国的最后一篇日记了。

几经周折和苦难,终于要出国了,这对我到底意味着什么呢?要走了,离开这温暖的家,离开妈妈,这对我到底意味着什么呢?

明天下午上火车,15日到上海,19日从香港飞美国。这期间的艰难旅途无人知晓

这本日记到这里就结束了。留给我的后代,但这对他们又会意味着什么呢?

别了,旧日的生活;
别了,养育我的家;
别了,妈妈

创业艰难!
 

1988.9.21 (三)

一切梦想都成了现实,
在这现实之中,
生活竟好似梦幻一般。

919日下午4点到芝加哥,我像仍在飞机上漂然,完全在梦中了。无意中踏上了梦寐以求的土地... 这是新生活的开始。尽管我根本不知新生活会给我带来什么,但我深深地意识到,这种新生活对我整个一生的影响都是无法估量的!

Venturing Out (3)

It feels like Fall now, especially early in the morning.  There is this crisp, fresh coolness in the air that wakes you up, especially when you're out in the middle of nowhere... 

After 2 hours and 113 miles, we arrived at a vineyard in Michigan.  The old couple greeted me with warm smiles and directed me to the location of 2 specific types grapes I was interested in: Concord and Jupiter. It was a sunny, beautiful day with mild winds spreading the sweet smell of the concord.  It reminded me of my childhood days when concord grapes were our family favorites.  Little Jupiter grapes were not only tasty, but also beautiful -- hanging there waiting for you to envy them and love them back. At that moment, the world returned back to normal.  The sun was still shining, the wind was still waving, the gentle sweetness in the air was still enticing... The grape-picking experience was calm, pleasant and relaxing -- you'd take your time, pick your favorite bunch of grapes and let your mind wondering freely... 

Why is this not heaven on earth???

Vineyard, Michigan
September 18, 2020

 


 

Sunday, August 23, 2020

Venturing Out (2)

Not sure if I'm going to document every small, insignificant trip I make during the 2020 pandemic... I might, simply because they have become such rare events now.

This is the second time since mid March that I ventured out beyond grocery shopping.  Made a little kayak trip today, and I am so proud to have driven 84 miles for the day!!  Many of my friends asked me how I'd adjusted the significant change in my lifestyle -- staying home for months without any personal or business travel.  Strangely, I really didn't feel that the change required any efforts. I love it, and I am totally at peace to stay home all day, every day!  Maybe this is how the world should be -- human beings probably don't really need to fly around and "appear" to be so busy. 

Again, I really, truly appreciate the opportunity over the past 5 months to slow down and settle down.  To have the time and interest to ask myself a few simple questions and allow myself to reflect every day on what's really important in life... When you think about it, do we really need to rush through life -- like how we've done over the past many years????

Live the life you love, love the life you live!

Lake Barrington, IL
August 23, 2020



Sunday, August 9, 2020

The Precious 10%

It's been 5 months during which many people's lives have been turned upside down. I feel so sorry for those who lost their family and friends, or even those who were infected.  I tried to take my responsibility by staying home as much as possible and wearing masks when going out...

Other than that, having a big chunk of time to stay home is a blessing. It forces us to slow down, to listen to ourselves and to be truly productive.  For me, the most significant accomplishment was to finish digitizing and processing our family photos.  From more than 9,000 photos (1988 to 2004), I selected about 850 pictures, less than 10% of the total, to process and keep. The rest? Letting Go!!  I've already thrown away 11 huge albums (from the attached piles).  More actions to come.

I have a hard time to understand why we took so many family pictures, especially for Michelle.  Thanks to the technology, all photos after 2004 were digital.  When you think about it, is it true that we only need 10% of the STUFF that we've accumulated over the years? Is it true that less is more?? Is it true that we often cherish the precious 10%??? Going forward, simplicity and minimalism will be the guiding principles for life. 


Saturday, July 25, 2020

Venturing Out

Sitting here composing this email reminded me of all the real "adventures" I've had over the years -- the countless 3am alarms and the constant long drives logging well over 800 miles per day...

Today's event is a MUCH milder version, and I hesitate to even call it an "adventure."  However, during the great pandemic of 2020, this can still be considered as a drastic act.

For the first time in 134 days, I drove 92 miles (round trip total) to Wilmington, IL to pick out fresh blueberries.  If this happened two years ago, I might have simply forgotten to tell you about it, as so much was going on back then.  But not now, this small, insignificant event signifies my baby steps to venture out of my "pandemic bunker." 

The entire experience was serene, surreal, and sweet.  We were dropped off at the blueberry field by an old-fashioned tractor, and were left with many, many blueberries and all the freedom we can possibly get.  After 134 days of social distancing, seeing so many kids running around was simply disorienting.

For the first time in a long while, I felt there was no point to rush anything... I let myself wandering around, under the morning sun, with the birds and kids laughing in the background...  I made sure to take the time to only pick the jumbo blueberries; I intentionally tried to go back to the same row of branches to find the "lucky ones" that I'd missed in the first round; I carefully examined how different size, shape and color blueberries were co-existing together; and I could feel the tremendous calmness going through my body -- I see nothing but these peaceful cute little blueberries!

All in all, I think the pandemic has shrunk my world significantly.  However, it also gives me the opportunity to slow down, to experience each small "adventure" in a deeper way, to recognize and respect nature with new perspectives. 

Do these beautiful blueberries know how different the world has become??? 

Blueberry Fields
Wilmington, IL
July 25, 2020          


 

Thursday, July 2, 2020

Daily Schedule: July 2000

I found Dr. Michelle's summer break daily schedule from 20 years ago, when she was 10 years old.  Dr. Michelle turned 30 last Friday -- time flies.

I have also been scanning/processing some 400+ old photos.  There are many great photos over the years during special times and at exotic locations... But I love this one, at home, when Dr. Michelle was only 3.5 years old.  It's so ordinary, and with such a level of nothingness to it.  But that's life -- a sum of countless ordinary moments.  And somehow, through these endless trivial little things, a 3-year old turned into a doctor who can save lives.... Pretty unfathomable, but entirely possible.
 

 

Friday, June 26, 2020

Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday, Dr. Michelle!!

Here is a 30-second clip covering your journey for the past 30 years - enjoy it!! 
 
https://www.facebook.com/1604045045/videos/10216995555353456/

Thank you, Chelle, for being such a curious, creative, bright and (at times) challenging little soul in our lives; thank you for taking us with you on this unforgettable journey; and thank you for your unwavering trust in us over the years.  I have learned so much from this incredible experience, and I cherish it every day.  

I remember the days when you tried to test my knowledge by asking me to name the nine planets in backward order in English; I remember the days when you tried to prove your love for me by telling me that you “wuv” me to the moon and back;  I am still finding your little notes, booklets, drawings, poems and stories everywhere in our house; I have collected every issue of The Nutmeg Times that you published; and I am keeping all the announcements and schedules of the English Class you offered to me and Dad...

I don't know about other kids, but it did take a village to raise you -- and you've made us very proud.

Cherish life, Chelle, with love and passion!  Cherish the opportunities you have to save lives.  Be the BEST doctor you can be and bring hope, comfort and peace to your patients. 

Love,
Mom


Saturday, June 20, 2020

16 years of history: 1996 to 2011

Yes, I have been a good citizen, staying home and keeping my head down - to reconstruct a piece of history!

It all started with my continued effort to de-clutter. My goal was to throw away "something - or - anything" every week. When I found a whole box of weekly calendar books of mine from 1996-2011 (missing 2007 for unknown reasons), my initial reaction was - "Great, I can finally throw away this big box of heavy books."  Then, a soft voice: "Let me take a look before throwing them away..." and that's when the de-cluttering took an unexpected turn.

I flipped through less than 10 pages of the 2001 book and told myself right away: "Wow, I can't throw these away!"

What followed was several weeks of intense work of digitizing the 16-year unforgettable journey.  I stopped using calendar books when I started my most recent job in January 2012.  Why? I don't know.  Maybe I've finally come to the realization that there are more important things in life than a job!

Looking through these 780 pages felt like traveling back in time - when I took notes of every detail of my projects so diligently; when I spent so much time traveling for work; when the companies were so chaotic that I couldn't recognize the 2 names of my bosses on the page; when my little Michelle would remind me of her existence by periodically inserting her crooked handwriting in my books... It was truly a bumpy journey - filled with long nights, working holidays, and endless "change" and "unknown..."

Then it was the day when we sent Michelle to grade school, to junior high, to high school, and finally, to college in Boston on 8/22/2008; the spring break when we went to Key West; the summer break when we went to Alaska; the winter break when we went to Mexico; the spring breaks and winter breaks when we went to China to see grandma and grandpa...           

Traveling back in time is a profound experience.  You'd have a chance to look back on life with different and/or better perspectives; You'd have a holistic view on the entire journey, to understand the things that you were too young to understand in the past; You'd finally have time to reflect and absorb... And more importantly, you'd have a chance to ask yourself again: "what's the most important thing in my life?"  With that, hopefully, you'd be able to live forward with a better sense of awareness and clarity. 

Now, what about the de-cluttering???  Do I have the courage to truly LET GO of these books???  






Thursday, May 21, 2020

My Dear Little Naper

Well, I said final good-bye to my dear little Naper at 6:17pm tonight.  He is out in the world on his own now.  Hope someone will love him the way I did...

Nothing more needs to be said.  Read the emails below, you'd understand how much little Naper meant to me over the years.

By the way, he went to Boston for 5 years (May 2014 to June 2019), came back last June.  I just kept him at home... for no reason...  And today, he left me for good!

Pictures below were taken in May 2014 when he was 11 years old.


----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Pei Tang <tang_pei@yahoo.com>
Sent: Sunday, May 25, 2014, 7:50:52 PM CDT
Subject: Re: My Little Naper

After 18 hours and 999.7 miles, my little Naper finally arrived in Boston today at 12:30 pm, safe and sound. 
As some of you may already know, he was once again a real little trooper during the 18 long hours from Naperville to Boston.  It's been a sentimental trip where I took pictures of him at every stop... I would take photos with my iPhone and sent them to my friends with the following narratives: 

My handsome little Naper in Indiana!

My lovely little Naper in Ohio, making his way to Boston! 

My beautiful little Naper in New York!

After 12 hours and 693 miles, my hard-working little Naper is going to spend the night at this peaceful place (Liverpool, NY)! 

My brave little Naper just came through dense fog and is resting at Little Falls, NY!

My loyal little Naper in MA.  Ironically, the car next to Naper is exactly the same as my new car, even has the same color! 

After 18 hours and 999.7 miles, my elegant little Naper finally arrived in Boston, safe and sound!

I asked myself "Do you really need to be so dramatic and sentimental about everything in life?"  That really got me think hard.  I don't believe I am trying to create drama.  But rather, because my life has been simplified to a point where literally everything I own has a deep purpose and special/meaningful use, I become very much attached to them -- to the very FEW things I have, and my little Naper is one of them!!! 
Now Naper is going to be with Michelle for the next few years.  I only said ONE simple thing to Michelle: "Love him the way I do!" 



From: Pei Tang <tang_pei@yahoo.com>
To: Pei Tang <tang_pei@yahoo.com>
Sent: Saturday, May 17, 2014 9:56 PM
Subject: My Little Naper

Believe it or not, my little Naper is leaving me! 

For those of you who don't know, Naper is my lovely little white Lexus, and he has been with me since summer of 2003.  He got his cute name when I had to relocate to Reno for my job in 2004.  At the time, he was the only thing that brought warmth and familiarity to my life out in the desert...  So I name him Naper (abbreviation for Naperville)!

Over the past 11 years, we've traveled through rain and snow, and we've thoroughly enjoyed spring flowers and fall colors... It has truly been an incredible journey.  I love my little Naper deeply, and he always loves me back with his unwavering loyalty and reliability!!! 

Well, Naper is going to Boston next weekend, and he will become Michelle's loyal friend -- I hope!
I completed a big full service for him this morning making sure everything is in good condition for Michelle.  I also took a few pictures for him today just so I can remember how incredibly beautiful and elegant he is... 
Here, meet my lovely little Naper!!!

By the way, for the past 11 years, the 2 little bears have always been in the back seat with their seat-belts securely fastened.  Their excellent behavior once touched a police officer.  When the officer pulled me over for some stupid reasons, he looked at the bears and smiled... so, I got a verbal warning instead of a ticket -- thank goodness to my 2 little bears!!   





Saturday, May 9, 2020

Larry Brilliant: TED Talks on Pandemic: 2020 and 2006

It's not that we lack brilliant minds in this country, the problem is we don't have the ability to listen, to comprehend and to act.

Larry Brilliant is an infectious disease expert who was deeply involved in ending smallpox for the world several decades earlier.  The following are the TED Talks he has given over the years.  The first one was from 2 weeks ago regarding Covid-19.  The second one was from 2006 where he laid out how to prevent a global pandemic (starting from 15-minute mark) - it was such a great aspiration! 

Friday, May 1, 2020

Listen to Your Life


Listen to your life.  See it for the fathomless mystery that it is.  In the boredom and pain of it, no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it, because in the last analysis, all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.

-- Frederick Buechner  


True understanding is to see the events of life in this way: "You are here for my benefit, though rumor paints you otherwise."  And everything is turned to one's advantage when he greets a situation like this: "You are everything I was looking for."  Truly whatever arises in life is the right material to bring about your growth and the growth of those around you.  This, in a word, is art.  Everything contains some special purpose and a hidden blessing; what could be strange or arduous when all of life is here to greet you like an old and faithful friend?

-- Marcus Aurelius
 



Wisdom

The endless cycle of idea and action,
Endless invention, endless experiment,
Brings knowledge of motion, but not of stillness;
Knowledge of speech, but not of silence;
Knowledge of words, and ignorance of the Word...

Where is the Life we have lost in living?
Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge?
Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?

-- T. S. Eliot