Chinese Parenting

There have been discussions on Chinese Parenting over the weekend, and it is comforting to see Michelle recognizing the critical elements of parenting.  She forwarded an article to me on "Why Chinese Mothers are Superior."  Honestly, I don't believe I am superior to Western Mothers.  But I know I have given my very best to Michelle.  The following is from the article and that's what I have been preaching to her over the years.

Western parents are concerned about their children's psyches. Chinese parents aren't. They assume strength, not fragility, and as a result they behave very differently.

What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up.

Chinese parents demand perfect grades because they believe that their child can get them. If their child doesn't get them, the Chinese parent assumes it's because the child didn't work hard enough. That's why the solution to substandard performance is always to excoriate, punish and shame the child. The Chinese parent believes that their child will be strong enough to take the shaming and to improve from it.

Chinese parents believe that they know what is best for their children and therefore override all of their children's own desires and preferences.

Western parents try to respect their children's individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions, supporting their choices, and providing positive reinforcement and a nurturing environment. By contrast, the Chinese believe that the best way to protect their children is by preparing them for the future, letting them see what they're capable of, and arming them with skills, work habits and inner confidence that no one can ever take away.